i la la la looove veronicaaureus.
&& i hate sandy nonna<3
dont cry because its over, SMILE because it happened.
BE KIND OR THE EAGLE WILL ATTTTTACK YOU! D:

AGE 13 bitches. get @ me (;
SEX im a male -.- bitch. I LIED, FEMALE :)
BACKROUND PORKCHOP to the fullllest (L)
LIKE fooood! && cake, choclate milkshakes.. yum, VERONICA AUREUS (L) annnd, that chick sandy nonna.
I don't rape , I bite.

i recently had a boyfriend..
yes recently, we were bestfriends before it all happened, and now? well now, were nothing.. we don't talk, we don't speak.. not a word. It's not the awkwardness, just the fact i love him so much that if i look at him i fall apart in tiny little pieces all over again because i know as much as i cry, as much as i talk about him.. he's not coming back. Thing is everything was going good, we were BESTFRIENDS . i told you everything about my life, i knew you had a part of me that you could break, but i loved you, it didn't matter.. and now? im here, heartbroken. boy i miss your smile, i don't see it anymore.. i miss you, i miss our late night chats & me seeing you everyday. you werent just my boyfriend, you were my bestfriend and i miss that. So now when people ask if im single i saw yes.. but not only am i single i lost my bestfriend in the whole wide world. how could we be so much to nothing? i miss you as my boyfriend i do.. but i miss you as my friend, and you meant the world to me.

yes, i know i've been really selfish latly.
but i just miss the fact that i walk alone to school, i dont see any of their faces when i turn that corner, i miss how everyday i don't see them, i miss how every part of me hurts not seeing atleast one of them on the feild, i miss it all yes.. but that doesnt change the fact ive been hating school & everyone in it, cause I don't.
i love guardian angels, i've been there practically my whole life, friends come and go right? Here on in ill try not to write about them.. even how much it hurts me that im losing touch with each of them everyday, like at recess sitting under a big tree of shade and making a huge whole with danii & tania, or me and jess.d dying for the stupidest reasons, & yeah. i miss veronica aureus & sandy nonna a lot, so what? doesnt change the fact that i've been rude about everything latly, i just hate losing friends i take it personally. so sorry to my fellow grade 8's. I love guardian angels nothing will ever change that, although it KILLS me to think of the past its my home, i can't move.. and everyone i came closer to this year is making me year better each day they help me forgot about everything. my bestfriend Domenic Borg can always give me a huge smile on my face no matter what, and Ovie .. hes going through a hard time too but he gets everything i went through and i love my big brother for that, and kathleen moniz the girl that has been with me through thick & thin how can i forget, i love her for that. each of them are making grade 8.. so from now on im letting go of the past & keeping a smile on my face. sure im going to miss them like crazy, but i need to do whats right for me and just.. finally let go, just like they let me go the last day of school.
Good bye, & hello grade eights, lets make this year a good one for the sake of everything. love you all, wont forget anything either, so thanks for an amzing year last year, but its time to move on. & today is that day. love you all, please don't forget that.

I've been keeping my head up high as told, but latley if you see me with an attitude
im not being rude, im just sick of people putting me down.. and im not taking this shit anymore. I miss all the grade nines so badly, ive been trying to forget about all of them but its so hard not seeing there faces, saying hi, or having somebody you can trust with your life. I finally put my head down, and said "enough is enough".. although sadness raged through me,i really don't have any idea what to do, i hate everyone in this piece of shit hellll of a school so why bother anymore?
im fucking done, head down, tears falling.. cause its going to be a long year,
but once im out of there im not even stepping one foot near that school or those people who are making my year fucking shit, i fucking hate this.
and for my so called bestfriend .. i only got three, borgie mariluz & sandy ..
your not one of them

Every girl has her bestfriends, the drama, a secret kept to herself.. and an imagination full of crap that would never happen in real life, basically a fairy tail. In my fairy tail.. my so called "bestfriends" still talk to me, and help me out. Like i said 'fairy tail...'
Lmao.. Its kinda funny how everything works out, like when last year you promised to still talk to me, and make time for me? Lol, hows your plan working out for you? Cause last time i checked you havent seen me in more then a month & when i did see you i finally realized how stupid i was for wasting a whole year on you, like a fool i was jumping up and down calling your name for what? for you to just say "jessica.. hey?" Right, so you go on with your life, expierence your girls.. and for the others I hope you know the only people left standing in my life that i do care about actually talk to me, or make a fucking effort. so next time you see me, dont talk.. thats fine too, you wouldnt want to anyways, its just me doing you a favour peace out roch peoplee. *You WONT be missed* < from the beating heart in my body.

I know I did nothing wrong, but if i did nothing wrong why do i feel like the world is crashing down on me? Why do i feel like I need to hide away from the darkness, why do i feel that nobody likes me? Oh, thats right.. because i have no friends, everyone thinks i lied, and yeah as far as i can tellthe world is crashing down on me. I know, i did some pretty terrible things in the past years, but my past should not determine who I am now.. Who knew in not even a ten minute conversation people can start assuming things, and start a whole big argument? Well, i certainly had no friggen clue. I told everyone what I said, and even my close friends turned there back on me.. every single one of them. I miss last year, whenever I had a problem they grade 8's would give me advice, and everything would be just fine. Now, there gone. I have two friends, and nobdy believes me.. not one, not a soul. I can say from the bottom of my heart I didnt say that. i really want to escape all of it, i do.. i knew this would happen sooner or later but i really didnt think all of it would happen so soon. I was tearing up all day today cause im the only one following with the real liar who knows the truth, but they dont believe me..
i know i know, my writting sucks now. nor can i write anymore.. have you noticed? whatever, i hate my fucking life. cause not only do i have no more friends, but the guy i really like is gone to, you happy? he left. all my friends left, i just want things to go back to normal, when everything was just "sad" with no drama.
now life is sad with the drama. i fucking hate this, i really do.
i fucking hattttttttte THIS. FUCCCCCCK.
i want to die
so until next time, bye blogspot,
ps- i dont think any times could get any worse then this.
so there may not be anything else to blog about..
peace. lets hope i dont get my head ripped off, ha.
:(

Today i talked to a friend.. one of the two who arent ignoring me.. aha. and i asked him who he likes for you know, conversation?
he said "i like myself, doesnt everyone?" without even thinking i said "really? cause i dont like myself.."
not cause im a bad person, just i dont have one close friend who actually believes me, none at all. I dont know why, I told them millions of times I didnt say that, yet they refuse to believe me.
I would never do that. Ever. All my so called friends turned their backs on me, i dont have a single soul who i can turn to other the sandy.. but shes gone to highschool. as for now, i dont now what im doing or anything, i cant skip school forever, and i cant hide from it all, why wont the believe me? :( as wet drops fall down for my face I wonder if it will ever be okay again.
I just want to move away, or even get hurt and get rushed to emergency.. I know that sounds wrong, but sometimes i just wonder if people will ever care, or ever believe me.
im not a liar, i didnt say that. Honest truth, I didnt. Now everyones mad at me, and i have nobody.. I'm having a hard time with everything, i hate my life so much and i really want to escape from it all, from everything. My past doesnt determine my future i know i did some pretty terrible things in my life but nobody can get past what i did.
So, im sorry for anything you think i've done. but just because you all think i did something i didnt im not going to apologize to get on your good side, and when you all come back.. if you do, ill know the time i needed you the most you werent there for me.
cause im having a pretty ruff time. nobdy notices, but they sawme cry they know im hurt, they think i lied..
Well, everyone has a label a whore, the jock, the nerd, &me Oh, well im that girl who's a "liar" the "loner" the one that misses her bestfriends in grade 9. < thats what people see me as, but obviously nobdy notices or cares, cause if you did you would listen to my side of the story..

I always knew the day would come when I'd be forgotten,
they all refused to listen to me, and they all told me they wouldnt turn out to be like the year before theirs.. Turns out, i was right.
I miss having to see there faces everyday, or chilling with them at recess,
i miss having an actual conversation with them & i could actually consider them one of my bestfriends.. I miss the laughs and the memories, time flew by..
its like now i have to make all the effort to keep intouch, its like im the only one who actually misses them.. its like i have to make plans to chill, or i have to say hi, I mean i guess we were never really that close, right? I believed all of you, fell for all of your lies, and now? where the fuck did you all go? please tell me..
Cause to be honest, im a bit confused,
while im sitting in my desk thinking of them their meeting new people, rushing to get to their lockers.. man, i feel useless.
they say you dont really know what you have until its gone.. but i can truthfully say from the bottom of my heart that i always knew what i had, who i had, and i can also say not only do i miss them all but i appreciated each of the many things they did for me.. but now i have nobody.. i try to hold back the tears but they were my life.. i guess i wasnt as important to them as they were to me. I guess im another sammie from friggen jersey shore,
whatever, i knew this day would come.. i knew it, anyone who tells me otherwise
you all turned your back on me when i needed you the most.
Bye i guess, you'll all be missed

Be kind, or the eagle will ATTACK YOU!

veronica aureus*
danaca camara*

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